::A wakeup call.
3:59 a.m. - 2006-11-19
I thought i'd continue where i left off with my little attempt at a jingle last night. That jingle goes down in my poetry attempts along with
I've had it with people who constantly seek reassurance for their behaviour. See if you sleep around, just live with it. Admit you do it or don't admit you do it, just don't talk about it.
But when you bring up your scoring and your whoring in normal conversation with people and make the rest of us privy to your fucktype tendencies then how do you not expect to get judged?
Example
I proclaim loudly in a room, "I KILLED MY GIRLFRIEND BECAUSE I AM MAD". Can i expect people not to call the police or IMH after such a proclamation? Can i expect not to be judged?
No.Not because of anything else but the fact that I have myself brought it up in front of everyone.
I would like to make it clear to a few individuals to use "us" very carefully. I'd much rather not be associated in the "us" nor be included in the whole, we've been through this together crap. The reason why i deal with you is not because I've been you. But because i take pity on you.
Just because i still respect you or have some regard for you, does not mean that i want to be you or think you're a nice person. There are a lot of things about you that i find dubious, stupid and amazingly ugly. I cannot believe that any person with an intellect comparable to yours would act in such a way.
Sometimes i don't know if you respect yourself. Can you look into the mirror in the morning and actually see yourself? Because if i were you, i'd be so upset. I know I'm being harsh but even then, its not like you're even feeling it like a slap in the face are you?
You're now stuck under this rut and yes not all of it is your fault. But don't you think that all this could have been avoided? You're not dumb. You're not stupid. You are a perfectly capable,beautiful and esteemed person. But you had to fuck it up.
I don't know where it goes wrong. Perhaps the influence of alcohol. Perhaps a bad breakup. Perhaps some log that hit your head when you played catching in Primary school. Anyhow, its about time you get your act together.
Yes, you were dealt unfairly in this one incident. But think back about the million times when you have done this to the people who really loved you. You did actually have someone's true and sincere love at one point in time. Someone who was willing to look at you as a beautiful and affectionate soul. What did you do? You did exactly what people do with you now, to that person.
Is that what they call Karma? Perhaps.
I'm really in no place to say anything i know, because you after all are no one to me and this issue has nothing to do with me. But i thought perhaps one day, you might actually look at this and realise its about time to act your age.
You're not 14, when its cool to do stupid things to yourself. Its no longer reversible as it was when you were a teenager. Try to keep that in mind..
